When I first set out to write this post, it was going to be all about how our family was doing life long distance because of Coco’s freelance gig. Back in September, Coco got a great opportunity to work out of Manhattan on a project for The Street and Sports Illustrated. He got a call on a Friday to head to work, and the next day he was on a plane. I would stay back with the kids and keep things business as usual here.
What did that mean for our family?
It meant that for the foreseeable future, we would be living our life long distance, depending heavily on phone calls, face times, and the occasional weekend trip to see each other. We would be marriage commuting. Yes, it would be challenging (and it was), but doable. This kind of set up isn’t for everyone, I know that. Coco and I pride ourselves in having a strong marriage because we do the work and show up and support one another. I’m not saying that it’s a walk in the park; no marriage is; but we are committed to one another 10000 percent.
I was clear on one thing- I wasn’t uprooting the kids. I wanted to keep things routine here for them- school, activities, etc. We would visit during holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas and Spring Break, and in between that, Coco would fly down because one ticket is a lot cheaper than three.
I’m someone that enjoys her alone time. I like some form of order or system (that I control as much as I can because as we all know you can’t control everything) and I can easily entertain myself. I missed Coco terribly and there were definitely moments that I wished he could hop on a plane and come home, but at the same time, I did I enjoy not having to clean up after someone else! Ha! I was able to focus more on me and what I wanted to do. On the flip side, counting down to his visits were always a treat and we really maximized our one-on-one time together and our family time. It was so special. The distance definitely made the heart grow fonder. I just felt bad for the kids, Maya mostly, because she’s so attached to her daddy. My heart would hurt when she would cry because she missed him.
This has been our living situation for the past six months. Coco was kicking ass and we were so proud but I knew too it wasn’t easy for him. He missed us terribly. He bounced around from Air BnBs to his parents’ house in Long Island. That was a big silver lining to being away from us; he had the rest of his family there in NY. As far as for me and the kids, we settled into a nice routine. I juggled drop offs, pick ups, work, making dinner, miscellaneous events, birthday parties, activities, doctor visits, and a whole bunch of other stuff. I was able to see how much I could handle and it really boosted my confidence. I was proud of myself. Yes, there were days I wanted to cry because things got hard and I was overwhelmed; but I would somehow find a way to make it work and find my center. I thanked God for those challenges and for the strength to believe in myself. Coco was supportive when I needed to vent, so were my friends when I needed their help, my therapist, and God bless babysitters. I’ve mentioned that Coco and I don’t have the luxury of help or having much, if any, family here. My dad is extremely limited in what he can do and the bulk of our family is scattered in NY and in Toronto. My Buccio party of four is my support system and Coco and I are a team.
Fast forward just a couple of weeks and here we are. We went from living apart to living together 24/7 in a blink of an eye. No in between! Talk about getting thrust into the other extreme pretty quickly. The Coronavirus quickly shut things down and Coco was on a plane back to Miami. There was no more work for him and just like that, the gig came to an end. It was a blessing in disguise because now he is home with us. Imagine if he would have gotten stuck in NY without being able to come home? That would have sucked for all parties involved. Yes, losing that income hurts our pockets, but it seems that we won’t be the only ones on that boat. This new normal is shaping up to be interesting and unpredictable.
Another element of that new normal? Being around each other 24/7! God bless. This is probably the most time families have spent with one another, including married couples. The memes are funny because they’re true! Talking to other friends and families and listening to their marriage war stories in the times of Corona are comforting and pretty hilarious! Looks like everyone is annoyed but still in love. Kind of (lol). In between the eye rolling and the ‘where did you put the remote?’ arguments, we remember what’s important- staying healthy and safe with those you love the most; because at the end of the day, the only people I want to be stuck indoors with are these three nuts.
So remember- hug your people now more than ever, cherish the family time, and most importantly, wash your hands.