It seems like we are constantly bombarded with the notion of ‘balance’ in some way, shape or form. From the gimmicky to the self-help, we are all on a quest to find that elusive thing called ‘balance’ in some capacity. I ask you, and we’re all going to have different opinions here- is balance attainable? What does the word ‘balance’ mean to you?
When I think of balance, I think of a steady stream, unbothered by outside forces, and maintaining some form of order while merrily chugging along. It’s all put to the test, however, the moment something is out of place, or something comes to disrupt that steady stream. I guess you can say that’s pretty similar to this game called ‘life,’ and our constant hunt to find that perfect balance.
As a parent, a career woman, a wife, and the other unofficial titles I hold (ha!), balance can be a tricky thing. I don’t particularly feel that work-life balance is equal at all times. There will be times when the scale will tip more generously towards your family priorities and I think other times, that will shift towards work and/or anything that life throws your way. I think having a realistic perspective is key, and I also think the meaning of balance is individualized from person to person. You need to work on a balance that works specifically for YOU and not your friend, or the other mom, or your neighbor or your co-worker. You don’t have the same life.
When we’re constantly on a quest to find the perfect balance, our happiness suffers. We don’t tune in to the present or to the ‘now’ as we should be because we are too focused on keeping everything in it’s place, and that in itself, can be harmful and can be unrealistic. It’s all give and take and sometimes ‘life’ takes more than ‘work,’ and vice versa. Priorities shift and we should be flexible, unless being miserable is part of your plan (geez, I hope not).
Instead of striving for something that can be a false truth, focus your energy on finding a happy medium and knowing that it’s okay to tilt the scale! It’s not about running yourself to the ground just to say, “hey, I did it all, but look at me, I’m exhausted, worn out.” That’s not balance. Balance is not having it all and knowing that is a beautiful thing!
How do I balance it all? Ha! Did you think I was the exception to the rule? Absolutely not. I don’t strive for that Pinterest-worthy balance. That is a disaster recipe for my mental health and my sanity as a human being. I’ve learned that the hard way. I know better. I give all of myself to anything I do, but I pick and choose what’s going to consume my energy and time and what’s going to give me fulfillment. Whether it’s work or life, the day will tell. I won’t sacrifice my happiness or my well-being and conform to society’s idea of “the perfect balance.” I will use my time wisely and when its time to shift gears, I will gladly do that.
Using my time wisely is part of that balance. I get a lot done while the kids are in school and aftercare. Whether it’s going to work, or shooting for the blog, or answering emails, I make sure to do it during school hours. Sometimes I do it AFTER the kids go to bed, but that doesn’t always work out because im tired or fall asleep, and that’s fine. I’ve had to learn to accept that it’s fine.
Case in point, I shot this look right before Maya’s school pick up. Not to toot my own horn, but Im very good at maximizing my time. Take credit for what your good at! I can’t cook a gourmet meal if my life depended on it, but give me a clock and a planner, and I can make magic happen. Shifting gears here- are you feeling this denim jumpsuit? I’m getting Jlo early 200O vibes! I remember I had an amazing denim jumpsuit when I first moved to NY in 2001 and I wore it to Club Cheetah (yes, same club from that Jayz song) and I thought to myself, ‘I feel like Jlo right now! lol’ Good to know that denim jumpsuits are making a splash in 2020! I’m so ready. Add a ponytail extension from INH HAIR and I’m Jlo on the 6!
JK. Call me KLo.